Tuesday, September 13, 2011

The Long Goodbye

I'm not exactly sure when my daughter told me that she and her husband had decided to move their family from Oregon (40 minutes from our home) to Ohio (2000 miles from our home) to be near her husband's family.  I think it was a year ago.  But since that day to this one, it's been one long difficult time for me.  My daughter has had a hard year, fixing up their house to sell, keeping it "staged" for showings, getting it sold, packing everything for the move... and now it's all done and she and the girls fly out in the morning.  Her husband will drive to Ohio after spending a week here finalizing his job and things.  

We've tried to spend as much time with the girls as possible.  We took them to the beach, have kept them for overnights, took them to lunch, etc.  As the "end" neared, on Sunday we took them shopping for snacks for the airplane trip.  Paige, the 3 year old grabbed this huge jar of cheese puffs and wanted to take it on the plane.. I just had to get a photo of them.  Jenna thought it was funny, too.
We also got them some tiny "LaLaLoopsy" dolls to take on the plane.  My daughter told me that Paige had pulled the yarn out of both pompoms on both their Sock Monkeys, so I brought supplies to fix them both before.. they.. were ......  gone.
Here is Paige's monkey with a new pompom.
Here is Jenna's monkey with a new pompom.
Last evening our daughter had a pizza "party" for family to see them one last time.  Here is our youngest son, Travis.. giving Paige one last hug.
My sister and her husband, he's having fun with our youngest grandsons.
My younger sister picked up Paige and carried her and held her until she had to put her in the car.. her last time... and the look on my sister's face made me choke up.  
We then went to our daughter's house to load up their tv armoire which they'd given to Travis.. and all the kids were racing around in circles on the front grass and having the most fun... and then we thought we should get.. one... last....... photo of them together.  ::choke::

Jenna, Hayden, Caleb, Michael, Gabriel and Paige.  The grandkids.
The 2 older boys are my middle/older son's.  The girls are my daughter's.  The little boys are my youngest son's.  And this is the hilarious results of us trying to get one good photo of 6 tired, over-excited kids.
Do forgive me for the backdrop.. it's the garage and the back of the fireplace.. certainly these were not fancy, staged, professional photos.   Just real kids and real life.
There was an attempted escape.
Note the fun and cheesy "CHEESE" faces on the little boys.  Note the baby girls going.. ewww.. don't touch me.... LOL  I must say, the older boys did their best to hold them all together.  
Today we went back one ... last... time.. and took the girls to lunch.. then to Finnegan's Toy Shop in Bridgeport Village near our daughters ex-home.  Here is Jenna.
Here is Paige.

And so.. life will now be different.  I just hope I can figure out how to be happy with it.  Wish me luck. And just to warn you.. people have told me ad infinitum.. how it will be fine... I can "Skype" with them and talk with them on the phone and maybe see them once a year.  And I am not consoled one bit.  Not ONE LEAST BIT.

The End.


  1. So, I have tears rolling down my face. I know it must have been a rough day to say the least. I will always remember that picture with the cheetios. and the two of the sock monkeys. Do I hear a road trip being planned now. Know the Windy City is on the way to OH and we do have a few extra bedrooms. Welcome any time.

    We are all here for you,

  2. I know that look. And I hope I've said nothing to hurt you or make you think it is easy. It is true that you can skype, phone, text, visit (and you will do all those things)--but it is also true that you will not love this new 'normal' because it isn't normal. I know I don't.
    Sending you hugs and prayers.

  3. Teresa, my heart is breaking for you. I have three grown kids, and three grandkids, and they all live in the same town as we do.
    And so, I can well imagine your pain. I have no words to help the hurt. None. It is going to hurt. I think I would get a credit card to use towards flying miles, and put every single purchase on it, just to accumulate miles, and then pay it of with each month. I have a friend who did that, and flew to see her grands as often as she could.
    I am so sorry for your hurt.

  4. Oh Teresa, this is heartbreaking... Skype and phones are such a meagre consolation when you're used to hug and cuddle up with these beautiful girls, when you have always been so very close (in both meanings). Seeing them once a year is very little, maybe your daughter and son-in-law could send the girls over on the longer school holidays? This is just an idea, I have no idea about flight prices within the US etc... The hurting will get less, know that a lot of people all over the world are thinking about you! ((hugs)) xxx

  5. Aww Teresa .. this is so sad. I really feel for you and grandpa. Now I'm all choked up.

  6. Ah Teresa I am so sad for you. This is such a sweet sad post and I can really imagine how you must feel. Virtual hugs are not the same as real ones, and the fact that you love those little girls so much just makes it harder. Sending you warmest wishes and hoping you find lots of other happy ways to fill your days till you adjust to not having them so near you. I'm sure they will always appreciate your care and love for them though.
    Take care, Teresa.
    Helen x

  7. Oh T! So sorry to hear the day has finally come. I have no advice really, because I live in the same town as all my family. But I can say that I have made friends with a lot of lovely people (including yourself!) from miles and miles away, the internet brings everyone closer. It will get easier, and you'll just have to visit Ohio a lot more! Hugs x

  8. I know that your heart is breaking. Phone calls and Skype are NOT hugs and kisses and giggles. Know that they have WONDERFUL memories to take with them that you created! Lots of (((HUGS)))

  9. I have my hand on my heart, and a lump in my throat...I totally understand. :) ((hugs))

  10. I've enjoyed reading your blog... I have to say, this post has my eyes filled with tears. I HATE GOOD BYES TOO! Thankfully, this good bye is filled with love & a sad joy. The joy that you know you'll see them again, the joy of knowing that this separation is because of love and honoring a parent's needs. The kind of joy that you raised your kids to put other's needs ahead of wants. I'm NOT looking forward to this day happening for us. Thank God we live in a time where we can call, text and skype! It isn't the same, but it's better then waiting a month between letters!! :)

  11. So terribly sad. There's nothing like having them within a short drive away. =(

  12. You have been so brave about this :) I too am feeling very sad and choked up for you xxx We will all look forward to news and photographs of the girls. It is going to be so special when you do see each other. What a massive sacrifice your daughter is making, I sincerely hope it all works out well for everyone. Best Wishes to you and your family. xxx

  13. aaww this really brought back memories and a tear in my eye !!
    i live in england and my brother and his family moved to canada 8000 miles away !!
    it was hard, but we keep in touch all the time x

  14. So sorry for your sadness.... I'm sure your daughter and her family will find comfort, solace and happiness with her husbands family close by. Such a blessings they are moving close to family! Prayers!!!

  15. Feeling heartbroken for you. Platitudes are useless. Be thinking of you often.x

  16. Dear Teresa feel so sad for you and know how you are feeling. Sending hugs to you all. Anne x

  17. Hi my friend, I'm thinking of you and hoping you hear soon that they are there safely. We are all here for you. xoRobin❤

  18. Huge Hugs to you both...choking back the tears here. It will just make the time you do get to spend with them even more special
    Trying to be positive for you
    Love and hugs from across the pond and good wishes to them all for their new life
    Huge hugs to you all xx

  19. I remember perfectly how devastated you said you were when your daugther told you they were moving... I can't believe it has been so long... have we "met" for so long??? -Wow-
    I'm sorry you're hurting, and people can say all kind of nice and supporting words but that doesn't make it any easier... you need to grieve and take your time to figure out life without them around you.
    Maybe it's the same, maybe it doesn't, to what I felt when Hubby told me we were leaving our country after the wedding... maybe it's the same to what I feel every time I say goodbye to Grandma and I pray to see her again.
    I know your empty pain, and I'm truly sorry you have it Teresa!
    Big hugs!!!!!!!!!

  20. I have a lump in my throat and tears. I know it's hard. I live 6 hours from my daughter and grand daughters. Closer I know but it's still hard. I do skype with them so it makes it better. It's not like the real thing but it's better than nothing or just the phone. At least you can see them growing up. Hugs.....xoxoxoxo

  21. Awww Teresa my lovely, Hug's to you my good friend, That big tub of cheese puff's did make me giggle bless her they were almost as big as her xxxx Take good good care of yourself you know we'll be here for you xxxxx

  22. Teresa, we have never met yet I think of you as a dear friend and I feel so sad for you. Wishing your family all the best with their move and sending you my love and a massive ((hug)) Joanna xx

  23. I've come back to revisit this, as when I first read it I couldn't bring myself to post anything ....it is just so sad, but you are a strong person and will deal with it in your own unique way. Having read so many posts about your adventures with these little girls, I am sure alot of your readers feel like we know them too. Hugs Theresa:)

  24. Hi Teresa, I know I can't say anything that will make this better so I won't but I'm sending you all the positive energy I have and want you to know we all care about you here in blogland, so if you ever need to talk about it, vent your feelings or just be reminded of the good times then we're here honey :-) x x x


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